cunnilingulitus
an affliction thought to be caused by the consumption of improperly processed canned tuna. the processed tuna is inadvertently combined with the male genitalia of dolphins caught in the same net with disastrous results. although temporary, the afflicted person has a obsessive compulsive desire to eat p-ssy. this condition can affect both males and females with strange results. this desire, caused by the male dolphin hormone is so strong, that it overwhelms the normal senses causing both heteros-xual women as well as h-m-s-xual men to eat p-ssy. one gay man reportedly attempted to eat his mother’s p-ssy while she was sleeping. although the condition is temporary and usually subsides within 48 hours after eating the tainted tuna, the social implications can be devastating.
andrew got fired from his job after eating tainted tuna salad. although he is gay, he attempted to eat the p-ssy of one of his female students immediately after lunch. the staff had no choice but to terminate his employment. luckily for andrew, the police suspected {cunnilingulitus] after noticing the strong odor of dolphin c-ck on his breath.
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