David Moyes


a person of a severe brain impediment and an uncanny knack for failure at whatever they attempt. people of this nature are naturally ginger and consume haggis for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
person: “i have no idea what i’m doing. i’m david moyes.”

person: “how on earth can you go 17 matches without a win?! he’s having a david moyes!”

person: “my wife and kids have left me. i’ve lost my job. everyone hates me. well, at least i’m not david moyes”

person: “why are united doing so sh-te this year?! ahhh david moyes”
to f-ck up something important.
to be tactically inept at a game that requires skill.
to be clueless in important situations.
to use bad luck as an excuse for failure.
i can’t believe i did a david moyes today.

you’re such a david moyes at chess.

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