dick measuring contest
a conflict in which two parties (ususally male) are vehemently disputing something of limited relevance. generally, both parties are somewhat wrong, but each refuses to be back down for fear of being thought the have the smaller of their two p-n-ses. similar to a p-ssing match, but generally, the conflict involved involves a larger element of machismo, and continues on only because neither side wants to be seen as the one who backs down.
the white house and the conservative right have been in a real d-ck measuring contest over the qualifications of this new supreme court apointee, harriet meiers.
a friendly compet-tion between you and your friends to see who has the best claim to say, “mine’s bigger.” both more reliable in its results and more fun for the compet-tors where the results are determined, not by the compet-tors themselves, but by objective female judges.
at the end of the d-ck measuring contest, she gave me a hand job.
p friendly compet-tion where guys display their pride to answer the question of, “whose is bigger?” not only more fair, but more fun, when judged by impartial female referees. especially when they take a “hand’s on” approach to the judging.
the time had arrived for me to be judged in the d-ck measuring contest, a rite of p-ssage for guys entering high school. louise put her hand on my c-ck to hold it firm and straight while jennifer held the ruler stretched out along its full length. as it happened, the number she read off – 9 7/8 inches – was enough for me to win, with a half inch to spare. what i enjoyed more than the thrill of victory, though, was the thrill i felt when louise, not releasing her grip, slid her hand up and down my shaft, until i came. nevertheless, i kind of enjoyed the notoriety my victory gave me, especially when suitably ambiguous stories recorded it in the student newspaper and, later that year, in the yearbook. needless to say, it not only increased the respect i received from the other guys, but my popularity with the girls – apparently, size does count, at least with some girls.
Read Also:
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the closest thing to a measurement of the size of ones ego or e-p-n-s. however, d-ck points are completely subjective and therefore completely and utterly useless. d-ck points can also be used to insult trolls. example one: guy1: hey check it out i have 67800 d-ck points! guy2: so f-cking what? guy1: lol you must […]
- Dictified
an intellectual verbalization delivered in a sarcastic or demeaning tone. usually followed by “smack-down” or “bam” or “blow.” “ryan, she just delivered a dictified smack-down in your face!” -or- “liz, that was a dictified blow to your ego.” to be proved wrong or “told” in a conversation or argument ponies are blue. no they’re not. […]
- dictionary for young people
urban dictionary, as called by old people what’s that dictionary for young people?
- dicty
probably the same as #1 just saw a silent movie made in 1927 by a black movie company for a black audience. one character was a high-toned composer/pianist. another character, a con artist, referred to the pianist as “dicty” in a disparaging way. so the word’s been around for a while. “leave that dicty man […]
- diddy twister
the practice of grabbing someone (male or female) by the nipple and twisting either clockwise or anti-clockwise until a sufficient level of pain is achieved in the twistee grab that madra rua and we’ll give him a good diddy twister the filthy knacker