Easter Bunny
a large creature from the forest of babalon, who sneeks into houses and lays eggs everywhere secretly. in the morning everyone must try to find them before they hatch and start feeding on the flesh of small children.
the easter bunny is coming tonight you know what that means stock up on your weapons!
an exceptionally large lagomorph that died for our sins (or was that jesus?) and, during the month of april, delivers delectable candy treats to all the good little gentile boys and girls of the world.
on easter’s eve, the easter bunny arises from his tomb to spread good tidings and tooth-rotting chocolate christ statuettes to all.
a lagimorph that delivers candy to kids.
i have to admit that i never believed in the easter bunny.
the easter bunny, an oviparous rabbit dextrous enough to carry baskets of candy and intelligent enough to arrange said candy in fake gr-ss, as well as launch m-ssive nation-wide marketing campaigns aimed at getting parents to sh-ll out for chocolate bunnies that turn out to be hollow and chocolate eggs stuffed with carcinogenic sludge. possibly an ancient deity or demi-g-d, but far more likely the result of government genetic experiments or the demented offspring of a chicken, a rabbit, and a cadbury company executive.
person 1:jesus christ! was that even a rabbit?
person 2: no dude, that was totally the easter bunny!
bunny that beats the sh-t out of people the other 364 days of the year
oh sh-t! run!,it’s the easter bunny!
easter bunny, often referred to an imaginary character which delivered easter eggs to children also refers to the rabbit eaten at the time of easter. a long tradition carried out by generations of europeans where rabbits (of any species) are roasted, usually alive, to be consumed as a sacrifice to celebrate jesus christ.
“say steve, have you got your rabbit ready for easter yet?”
“that be a fine specimen of hare for that there luncheon, easter bunny sure tastes good!”
a creepy creature that goes in all your rooms one night a year and distributes substances meant to slowly poison you over the course of your life. it also hides this substance around your house in the form of eggs, to be discovered by your little children and innocently consumed.
aunt bessie died of diabetes, must have been that easter bunny.
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