Elf on the Shelf


an extraordinarily stupid holiday tradition practiced by white, suburb-dwelling families which involves “hiding” a creepy doll somewhere in the house, for their young children to find. this may seem innocent enough, but the real motive behind this fad is to attempt to control the offspring’s behavior through the threat of the elf telling santa claus of the misdeeds they committed under the omnipotent surveillance of the elf. a adult satire of this is wh-r- in the drawer, simply replacing the elf with a scantily clothed barbie doll, and the shelf with a cabinet or drawer.
wife: jim, did you hide the elf on the shelf
husband: no carol, for f-cks sake, i told you it gives me the w-ll–s.

Read Also:

  • hungration

    so hungry you’re going to p-ss out i’m going to die of hungration

  • table 14

    the craziest m-th-r f-ckers around – these kids are the sh-t. they always seem to be in trouble yet try hard not to be. don’t get on the wrong side of this pack but once your in then it’s forever bruh except if you d-cks before chicks – don’t do that dude. the cool , […]

  • shitier

    to contain more sh-t. you are sh-tier then me at grammar!

  • noxor

    (от лат. “nox” – ночь, тьма) – человек (существо), склонное вести ночной образ жизни. – such a noxor. an ugly female. what a noxor.

  • Hobo's Cock Ring

    when ones flaccid p-n-s is put into an empty beer can and made erect by p-rn or some other method. often used at frat hazings. and for your final challenge, you will endure a hobo’s c-ck ring. whats that? you’ll see.


Disclaimer: Elf on the Shelf definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.