eton college bicycle


an advanced s-x position invented by the boys of eton college to compensate for the paucity of females, or complete lack of altogether. not recommended for those without a background in yoga or gymnastics. the position: two men -ssume the crab position, foot to foot, with their heads facing in opposite directions. a third partic-p-nt (of any gender) straddles one of the men, facing away from them, in a stood reverse cowgirl position. bent over at the waist, this third partic-p-nt can then access the other male’s genitalia, which it is recommended they then service orally. two chairs or stools can be used for back support, if necessary. it is rumoured that the rush of blood to the head caused by the crab position prolonged s-xual activity and can induce euphoria.
“what’s all that noise?”
“i reckon it’s benjamin and bill attempting the eton college bicycle again.”
“do they have a girl this time, or are they just using a c blocker again?”
“who knows.”

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