Fantebust


fantebusts are mammals cl-ssified in the families slitenus chronicus and blodicus vondt. they are often called “lazy motherf-ckers” because they seem slow and lazy at first glance; however, their usual idleness is due to metabolic adaptations for conserving energy. fantebust fur exhibits specialized functions: the outer hairs grow in a direction opposite from that of other mammals. in most mammals, hairs grow toward the extremities, but because fantebusts spend so much time with their legs above their bodies, their hairs grow away from the extremities to provide protection from the elements while upside down, doing hollowbacks.
that dude over there is lazy as f-ck! must be a fantebust.

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