fiange

pr-nounced “fee-ahn-gay”

when a man who is very effeminate and an obvious closet case h-m-s-xual is engaged to be married to a woman. at times he may not be gay but act just metros-xual enough that you could swear you smell a hint of c-m on his breath. if he was heteros-xual, he would be her fiance, but since the probability is high that he likes d-ck too… he is better t-tled as her fiange.

the woman in this farce of a relationship may be aware of this, she may be oblivious to it, or she just may not be bothered by this because she is sleeping with her co-worker/friend’s husband on the sly.
setting: an office cube somewhere…

female co-worker: hey, did you hear that bob & stacey are engaged!?

male co-worker: (laughs) oh… you mean “en-gay-ged”?

female co-worker: huh… i don’t get it?

male co-worker: what!? are you blind, deaf, or should i just call you helen keller? bob is as queer as a picnic basket in january! lispy -ss voice, and that swishy, prancy walk of his. i think he may even wear women’s jeans.

female co-worker: well, how could stacey and him have been together for so long if he’s gay?

male co-worker: because, you moron, she is sleeping with everyone’s husbands around here. bob is her fiange… kind of like a fiance except were all pretty sure he likes d-ck as much as she does… i mean, come on, if she was getting her needs taken care of by bob… why would she be sleeping with so-and-so’s husband?

female co-worker: wow… maybe you’re right!

male co-worker: duh!
a term used to cl-ssify dudes when they get engaged to other dudes. used really only in m-ssacusetts where gay marriage is legal.
“hey guess what? billy proposed to me today!”
“ok…um…that’s pretty awesome, i think, carl. so i guess he’s your fiange’ now.”