Finals Beard
a beard one grows around the time of semester finals. this is done for a number of reasons, but generally it is done because their focus shifts from their face to their failing grades.
guy 1: hey, what’s going on with ted’s face?
guy 2: oh, that’s just his finals beard. didn’t you hear? he’s failing like three cl-sses.
the beard that acc-mulates on a man’s face as final exams approach due to lack of time to shave. this can also be a bi-product of too many projects and big -ssignments to have time to stop and shave.
josh: dude, matt has a stubbly appearance about his face, today i saw him and it looks like he hasn’t shaved in ages.
angela: he’s got a serious case of finals’ beard, he’ll be fresh cut by friday night when finished with all his cl-sses.
a beard grown during finals in order to support the non-failing effort of students attending real schools. finals beards may give, good luck, increased -n-lytically abilities, better eye-sight, better hearing, ability to slow down time, ability to travel back in time. finals beard abilities are only available during finals.
1. buddy: “hey frank, what did you write for the third essay?”
frank: “what essay?”
buddy:”the ones we have to turn in with the final.”
frank: “essays?! i didn’t know about any essays! oh fu-wait!”
buddy: “what are you doing?”
frank: “finals beard, activate time travel!”
buddy: “what?!”
frank: “….”
buddy: “so is something supposed to happen?”
frank: “with what?”
buddy: “uuuh nevermind, so what are you going to do about the essays?”
frank: “i got them right here.”
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