Fratire

fratire is the mode of dress traditionally accepted by fraternities, especially prevalent in the south. the definition of successful fratire is “conservative”. this generally means solid colored polo shirts (never with popped collars), oxford style b-tton downs, khakis or dock shorts, traditional blazers, dock shoes, driving mocs or loafers, and d-ring or club belts. this kind of clothing will generally ensure full frat potential, however bleached or gelled hair or any kind of jewelery will overpower even the frattiest of fratire and make you look like a douche. in addition, true fratire must come from fine brands such as those below:

polo (the horse)
brooks brothers (golden fleece)
cole haan
vineyard vines (the whale)
southern proper
sperry
lacoste (don’t overdo it on this one – the crocodile)
costa del mar
(this isn’t a comprehensive list, just the basics)

also, one should never wear all of one brand. it screams “trying too hard”

things to avoid:

abercrombie and fitch
american eagle
gap
aeropostale
cargo shorts
puka sh-lls
flip flops
non-costa sungl-sses
jean shorts (jorts)
anything trendy
anything your forefathers would cringe at
brother 1: (wearing vineyard vines dock shorts, a brooks brother polo, sperry top-siders, costas with croakies and a polo d-ring belt)
brother 2: nice fratire man, we better get these gdis outta here before they see you or–
gdi: (head explodes)
a genre of writing aimed specifically at the 18-35 male demographic. often contains depictions of drunken escapades, hedonistic living, and irresponsible s-xual adventures. also conveys a mocking att-tude toward social convention, traditional male roles and aspirations of power and authority.
pioneered by internet writers such as tucker max, robert hamburger(author of real ultimate power: the official ninja book) and george ouzounian(a.k.a. maddox).
fratire was first coined in a new york times article written by reporter warren st. john called “dude, here’s my book”.
“wow man, that time i consumed a gallon of cheap vodka and had unprotected s-x with three transgendered hookers would go great in fratire!”
“wow, this book is rad. this “fratire” is something a drunken young collegiate lad like me can appreciate, having also a general disdain for society! lawlz!”