fruitini

fruit-based martini drinks/ c-cktails. mostly are non-alcoholic ‘mocktails’ (or, mocktinis), though it’s important to spike the d-mn thing with good ol’voddy (vodkatinis).

-crantini: cranberry martini.
-melontini: melon.
-appeltini: green apple.
-clementini: clementine.
-peartini: pear.
-apricotini: apricot.
-tomatini: tomato.
-peachtini: peach (basically called a billini martini. bellini is usually made with white peach purée/juice + champagne + crème de péche, you add the vod and bitters to make a martini).

related c-cktailian’s inventions:
-chocotini/ chocatini ( 4 vod + 1 crème de cacao, stirred over ice).
-javatini ( vod + kahlua coffee liquor + espresso garnished with a chocolate twist/ shaving).
-vodka espresso (similar to the black russian: 3 ‘triple’ espresso + 2 ‘double’ vod + dash of kahlua + sugar syrup shaken with ice).
-nicotini (a martini drank by a snoutcast in a ‘b-tt hut’!).
-k’tini (also spelled k-tini: has a saurkraut-stuffed olive instead of the standard piemento!).
-tequinis: tequila-based martinis (-if you are taken aback by the k’tini, then these use a ‘tomolive’ instead of the usual olive, which is a baby tomato stuffed with a piemento olive except these two:
-cajun martini (use chili instead of olive).
-coyote martini (made with chilis soaked in the drink for two days).
-dillitini (a large shot of vodka + a small shot of aquavit + a handful of fresh dill. shake over ice).
-marteanis: tea-based martini drinks like the greenteani (ice greentea martini).

‘martini culture’ and ‘martini bars’ are all the rage in ubercool j-pan (that’s why it’s called j-cool).
on msnbc the other day, i watched to my shock, a bartender fixing a ‘diamond-tini’ for a young couple: a ‘tini shaken with a 50k$ diamond in it! o_o

-if you still think that i’m bluffing, well, after you drink all those fruitinis have yourself a ‘clamato’: clam tomato mixture that mixologists like myself swear by as a hangover cure!
1.a homemade flavoured condom that is pr-ne to splitting

2.a bl-w j-b that leaves your c-ck smelling vaguely of friut
-“when baxendale asked for a friutini, he didnt expect dale to pull down his trousers”