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fuckfice

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• cleaning the shelf under the register

  when you clean under a mans b-lls with your tongue. what is that? ohhhhh!!! when i was cleaning the shelf under the register

• tapashacking

  the gaining of access to tapas by any means necessary, at times in an unauthorized manner for the purpose of unbridled culinary enjoyment. typically involves the identification of vulnerabilities in, and compromising of several fine establishments during a course of a single mealtime. when i’m tapashacking, i tend to exploit those more drunk than me. […]

• helpfulevil

  when your dad trys to run your life even though he is a billion years old and you are perfectly fine. i’m trying to push you into doing something so you don’t live in my bas-m-nt forever, i guess that makes me helpfulevil.

• poon spittoon

  while b-lls deep in s-xual interco-rs-, with a chew (tobacco) in your lip, one spits the tobacco juice into the action zone for added nicotine pleasure with a side of lube. “i totally gave some chick from the bar a good old poon spittoon last night!”

• moral peacocking

  when a person is outraged on social media so that their friends will think they’re a good person. moral peac-cks are famous for spreading fake memes because they don’t actually read the news or care irl. if you really cared about the middle east, you’d -know- the american news already reported that attack. stop moral […]

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