ghastinating
a portmanteau of “ghastly” and “fascinating.” while the definition is self-explanatory, i’ll provide an example:
i thought this up trying to recall a scene when i was immersed in nature. sitting perfectly still near my pond for a long time, i saw a snake catch a frog. the frog continued to scream while the snake swallowed it. even though i felt completely appalled and filled with a mad urge to somehow rescue the poor frog, i was still totally engrossed in the scene and felt, somehow, privileged to be a part of it. the experience was totally ghastinating.
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