Great Meadows

the cl-ssic definition of a “hick town”. located in northern new jersey, great meadows is home to sod farms, empty fields, and old general stores. sometimes referred to as “the ghetto of great meadow”, due to its lack of modern amenities common to almost every town, such as a supermarket, a bank, or even a police station. the population consists mostly of old farmers, and most of the residents know each other by name.
great meadows, new jersey is the sod farm capital of the country.
a cl-ster of houses between hackettstown and hope, nj. it is compiled of vienna, independence, townsbury, liberty and mountain lake. the most excitement in great meadows happens when our only local band, the quimby mountain band, plays at one of our bars or the firehouse at the lake. the hangouts in this area are limited, and consist of herbie’s ice cream, hot dog johnny’s and the firehouse at the lake. it is not uncommon for someone from “ghetto meadows” to be put on probation for doing weed, most of the time at a party in hackettstown, nor is it uncommon to walk aimlessly in the woods on weekends and after school. we also have a resident gang of farmers here in great meadows, called the meadows boys. they are known for their giant trucks with lettering over the front saying “meadows boys” and their anticlimactic farmer drawl. the summers are boring as h-ll here, and by senior year in high school, many meadows kids are dying to leave this sh-thole for college, but, inevitably, half of them will stay in warren county, growing old loving the place.
kid from three towns over: hey, where are you from?
gm kid: great meadows.
kid from three towns over: where?
gm kid: you know, liberty? independence?
kid from three towns over: uhh….
gm kid: oh, forget it. i’m from hackettstown.
great meadows is a red-neck town where half the kids that live there are either on herion, crack, c-ke, or all three. they think its cool to go sit at the only bar in town and listen to the half–ssed hippie band that seems to take pride in the fact that they are from that area. the three prominent families that live there, i’m sure, have inbred at some point. it also houses the infamous tale of the drunk old man and his prost-tute girlfriend who shot at a bunch of teenagers one night, thus putting the man in jail. the town is trying to be over-run by a greedy italian man, who has more money than g-d, but whose wallet is clamped shut tighter than a virgin’s -sshole. people think its cool to race down at the race-track or ride around in their pick-ups. most residents have the i.q. of 30, or atleast pretend to, do to the fact that if you aren’t an adult in the farming business, the only thing that could gain you popularity is heavy drug use. if you’re reading this, get out while you still can.
guy 1: “hey, did you see that hot girl at stage dolls last night? she had a nice set of t-ts.”

guy 2: “nah, i picked up a bundle at the gas station and went to go listen to the quimby mountain band. $2 beers man! great meadows rules!”