haggis
the conspiracy lives on.
they tell ye that the haggis be wee chopped up stuff stuffed into a bladder with pepper and spices, but ye don’ know the trooth!
the haggis is a wee wild animal!
resembles a hedgehog, but with fearsome teeth, claws and a tartan waistcoat. they eyes, too, they be red and glowing like the moon. they burrow deep underground, and live around the highlands. they hunt in clans. and they’re coming for yoo…
farmer’s wife: och! the haggis ha’ been at the sheep again the now! we’re f-cked.
farmer:
various chopped-up sheep guts stuffed into a sheep’s stomach or intestines and boiled with spices.
i think this was outlawed by the usda. no, seriously. you’re not allowed to eat in in america.
1. the heart, lungs and liver of a sheep ground into a paste with oats and barley and then boiled in the same sheep’s stomach. the main meal of burns night where it is served with ‘neeps an’ ‘taters, turnips and potatoes repectively.
2. a small ground mammal with tartan skin, one set of legs is often shorter than the other so they can run round hills, unfortunately only one way so haggis farmers haver the other way around the hill. haggis can only see in a straight line so in order to catch one a drunken stagger must be imitated in order to go unnoticed, this is known as havering.
spicy mchaggis, one h-ll of a guy.
1. scotland’s most well known food.
2. haggis mchaggis is the hilarious scotsman from ren and stimpy. one of the best characters ever. therefore any scotsman is a haggis mchaggis and it works to call anyone haggis.
1. lets eat sum haggis.
2. yo haggis, whaddup?
a verb meaning to leave your friends behind after being served first.
four friends go to the chip stand, all four order but one friend is served first, and instead of waiting for his other three friends to be served the first friend just leaves.
jim: “hey bill, you totally haggised out on us at the chippy”
bill: “it was cold out, i wanted to get back inside before i froze to death”
a three-legged mammal that lives in the forest. mainly found in the woodlands of egypt, new york and rugby but mainly found in the back gardens of young children. often -ssociated with the phrase “i can believe!”
“hey charlotte! did you see the haggis today?!”
“i can believe!”
a small fury amimal that has shorter leghs on one side than the other so it can round scottish hills bag pipes can be used as bait to capture
chase the haggis the other way it’ll fall over
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