Harlem Tumbleweed
these m-ssive balled-up clumps of highly mobile filth are a composite of acc-mulated human hair and artificial extensions that have been carelessly and flagrantly discarded from hair salons and like shops offering african hair braiding services where they roll (roam?) freely down city sidewalks.
local habitat includes but is not limited to the city of new york’s harlem neighborhood (aka, harlem, usa). generally docile, take note that harlem tumbleweeds can become considerably more aggressive in high winds, during which time onlookers should take special notice, as the potential threat of going airborne increases dramatically during windy weather.
due to their physical makeup, harlem tumbleweeds have the velcro-like ability to continue to acc-mulate hair, as well as other bits of urban refuse, during the course of their life-cycle.
dude, you won’t believe this: i saw a harlem tumbleweed fly directly into this b-tch’s face right as she stepped out of the manna’s on frederick dougl-ss boulevard. it had a used condom and a dirty band-aid stuck to it. she immediately burped up $8.84 worth of ox-tails all over the sidewalk in front of the restaurant. it was awesome.
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