Havertown
a city in located in suburban philadelphia in haverford township, delaware county. it has the privilege of being surrounded on three sides by the affluent towns of broomall, ardmore, and haverford and the curse of b-tting up against upper darby on the fourth. the school district is excellent, and the neighborhoods are safe. the main line is a stone’s throw away, which gives you access to all it has to offer: schools, first-cl-ss shopping, bike trails, etc. on the down side, havertown is full of soccer moms who won’t think twice about blocking the aisle in super fresh and refusing to let you p-ss, cutting you off in traffic, or stealing your primo parking spot at the manoa shopping center. their husbands are terrors, too, who will try to run you down at crosswalks with their beamers and get mouthy if you hold up the line at the bank or the supermarket. havertown kids are loud and rude and think they’re gangsta when they’re not. the cops are lazy but have plenty of energy to secret themselves in the dark recesses of the swell bubble gum parking lot every sat-rday night in the hope of nailing speeders. havertown has lots of havertrash, people who had to settle for havertown because they couldn’t quite afford that mcmansion on the main line; as a result, their att-tudes are foul and they take their disappointment out on those around them.
we moved to havertown because the main line was too expensive.
1 more definition
havertown is a suburb outside of philadelphia. it isn’t on the main line, but many there claim to live on it. i live in havertown, and there are many misconceptions about it. many jerks from the main line call us poor because we live outside of the very wealthy main line. just because we don’t have a wardrobe of abercrombie clothes, a huge house, or go to the top private school doesn’t make you better than us. it’s quite possible to succeed, and i’m able to attend a top notch high school because i won scholarship money. up yours main line, up yours.
“oh, she lives in havertown because she can’t afford the main line,” bobby said.
“actually, havertown is a great place to live. stop being stuck up.”
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