Hobo Reasoning


top definition
hobos have come to be known for their suspicious, pr-ckly, and overly-defensive nature regarding their habits and lifestyle choices.

this is highlighted by their cryptic and often obtuse replies to people questioning their actions, which have been described as ‘hobo reasoning’, or ‘hr’.

it is not uncommon for these replies to leave the questioner dizzy, confused and with a dramatically reduced sense of spatial awareness, allowing the hobo to slip off behind a parked derelict train, often in possession of the incapacitated persons wallet or other personal belongings.

it is the recommendation of this writer (from long personal experience) that you avoid questioning the habits of hobos and their disciples.
hobo reasoning:

commoner: excuse me hobo, but why does this map you drew me of directions to the local mcdonalds resemble mashed spaghetti?

hobo: the route depends, are you wearing one shoe, two shoe or no shoe?

commoner: hey hobo, why did you take the doors off all your cupboards?

hobo: well, due to tensions in senegal, screw holes placed above the 39th degree, have once again become loosened, and will soon travel south in search of local mcdonalds, regardless of shoes.

commoner: bonjour hobo, but what inspiration struck you as you named your hobo dog companion ‘whoosh’?

hobo: the sound of the wind beneath an overp-ss and the look of the smoke curling through odd-numbered mismatched fingerless gloves caressing over a chipped and cracked blue 44-gallon drum, heard through the mist of a 4-day moonshine bender.

commoner: pardon, hobo, but why has your bed been elevated upon common milk crates?

hobo: in the post-apocalyptic world of my boot-polish dreams, there is a chronic shortage of reliable milkpeople. with rat-lactic eager, half-glove grimy hand of profiteering intent the hobomob will fill that supply gap.

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