hotchkiss

the hotchkiss school is an independent boarding school located in lakeville, connecticut. founded in 1891. hotchkiss students are from all over but the most common areas are fairfield county, westchester (rye part of it of course), and new york city. they have a work hard play hard outlook. cl-sses are monday-sat-rday but students more than make up for it when they leave campus sat-rday nights. drugs and alcohol are forbidden so they are only used a little and c-ke is popular because it’s harder to catch students blowing lines than smoking weed and its harder to tell if a student is c-ked up than drunk. boys must wear coat and tie to cl-ss every day while girls wear skirts and tops. ties are all hermes and vineyard vines. the girls wear lilly pulitzer, ralph lauren, and theory. the biggest sports are football, fieldhockey, hockey, squash, and biggest of all lacrosse. most students go to ivy league or top 20 schools or small new england liberal arts schools. . schools that hotchkiss has sent the most students to in the last few years are georgetown, harvard, duke, cornell, bowdoin, brown, princeton, middlebury, yale, upenn, uva and trinity college. a lot of kids are recruited for sports. vineyard vines recently designed a pattern for both totes and ties in their custom collection for hotchkiss. other similar schools are deerfield, taft, groton, choate, loomis chafee, etc.
parent 1: my daughter just heard back from prep schools and is going to hotchkiss.
parent 2: thats great my son just graduated and is playing lacrosse and princeton next year.
the only man to successfully merge the twin world of history and no pants.
hotchkiss took off his pants today
the school you go to if your aunt is the same person as your mother. generally attended by children who’s special needs prevent them from wiping their own -sses. teachers have been known to show up to cl-ss drunk, stoned, and/or indecently exposed. while the school dean brags that many students grow up to attend the top 20 colleges in the country, that statement is only true if you consider secretly living in a cardboard box in the bas-m-nt and dealing crack to students “attending.” notable times in the school history include the syphilis outbreak of ’87, the great manure fire of ’96, and that time that a student realized that he wasn’t really in a horrible, strangely erotic dream.
did you hear about the hotchkiss kid who accidentally drowned to death when he tried to watch the rain fall down?