humpfort


the act of engaging in intercourse with someone who has recently been divorced/widowed/broken up. a combination of rebound and one night stand, the ideal time window for humpfort is anywhere from the day after to a week after, when he/she is still emotional, and possibly going through s-x withdrawal. the emotion clouds the mind, while the withdrawal cravings gives them drive; this combination means an easy score for pract-tioners of humpfort. if performed correctly, humpfort has all of the benefits of both rebounds and one night stands without the consequences. and if anything does go wrong, just blame the person you just slept with.
jake: “hans, you b-st-rd, you slept with my ex — not even an hour after we broke up!”
hans: “bra, ease up. it was humpfort, she totally was like all up on me before i could do anything. she’s a wh-r-, a complete sc-mbag and all the problems of the world can be blamed on her. good thing you broke up with her.”
jake: “true that, hans. let’s go listen to some generic rap-rock music in our rice burners.”

Read Also:

  • Clumsy Stranger

    the act of sitting on your left hand (if you are right handed) or right hand (if you are left handed) until it becomes numb. then you bust one out with that hand. “i was so bored last night i gave myself a clumsy stranger.”

  • drinkercising

    daily neighborhood walk with a large gl-ss of alcoholic beverage. “honey i feel fat today so will you make dinner while i go drinkercising? be back in, h-ll i don’t know, it depends how many refills the neighbors give me.”

  • a jew

    1) someone who is of the jewish religion 2)mike hawkins 3) a common insult 4) someone who is a jewish stereotype that man is a jew mike hawkins quit being a jew and give me a dollar please

  • Hunyock

    a idiotic or foolish person. “get out of the way hunyock” 1 more definition slang; a person of eastern european descent; used deragatorily. probably a derivative of hungarian + pollock. “this ridiculous procedure must have been designed by a hunyock”

  • Commack Motor Inn

    the commack motor inn is a place where, anyone 18 or older can go and rent a room. you can rent a room by the hour, or for the night. the commack motor inn is famously known for being a “dirty” place where young people go to have s-x. my boyfriend and i f-cked at […]


Disclaimer: humpfort definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.