I-Tach


a rhythm found in emergency departments, predominantly in the western and southwestern united states. “tach” is slang for the prefix “tachy-“, which means “abnormally rapid”.

context: where v-tach (ventricular tachycardia – an “an abnormally fast heart rate orginating from the bottom of the heart”) is a lethal heart rhythm, i-tach is not lethal… just annoying.

incidence: i-tach is most common among elderly hispanic females — with a hangnail, a rash, painful urination, or some other dire “emergency” — with 370 relatives surrounding the gurney upon which she lay.

uses: it is used both to gain familial sympathy and to coerce the medical staff to leave the bedside of heart attack, gunshot wound, or similarly trivial patients, and promptly attend to her “emergency” instead.

abuelita comes in at 3 a.m. with an emergency rash on her -ss she’s had for three weeks. she lies quietly behind her curtain for forty minutes without uttering a sound… then family shows up. and more family. and more. suddenly, abuelita begins…

“ayyyye… ayyyye… ayyyai….. ¡ayuda mi, dios!… ayeayeayeayeayeayeayeaye. yaiyaiyai..yaiyaiyaiyaiyai.. ayyyyyyee!”

witnessing this, you yell out mockingly…
tony… dr. kootersplat… call a code and get the rash cart to med-2 stat… better get a splinter-removal tech down here, too… the lady just went into i-tach.

Read Also:

  • Choco choco orgy

    when a big group of people point a each other and say choco choco until it starts to get naked. boy: i was at this choco choco orgy last night. other boy: me too, at that hotty’s house boy: the one i was at was just abunch of pervs in bikiniz

  • jizz bubble

    1. a contemptible individual, an -ssclown. 2. when s-m-n is expelled so rapidly it becomes aerated. 1. my boss is a real j-zz bubble. he criticizes me in front of other people every godd-mned day. 2. holy sh-t!! i banged my girl so hard i got a j-zz bubble!!

  • j-mats

    “j-mats” or “j-ck–ff materials” refers to media that is worthy of masturbation. common misconceptions include films such as cruel intentions and into the blue. s-x is indeed present in these films, however duration and graphic content do not provide enough time or desire to beat one out. often times, one is left with a hard-on […]

  • JNR

    scotsman of english descent who is obsessed with the womans breast. he is also a very funny guy who likes to slag people of different coulture and country . “omg on the alton towers bus i need to feel some t-t”said man “what about that new polish girl?”said person “no way shes and immigrant” said […]

  • jockying

    to try and undermine your rivals to get ahead. especially in time of evaluation. mr monroe is jockying to get that position, now that the new manager has arrived. to try and undermine your rivals to get ahead. especially in time of evaluation. mr monroe is jockying to get that position, now that the new […]


Disclaimer: I-Tach definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.