iphone effect
shortly after one person in the group brings out their iphone, the rest follow suit, ultimately ending all conversation and eye contact.
“hey, what do you want to order for drinks?” “not sure, let’s see what imbibe magazine has for their best beer this month.” first iphone comes out of the pocket–enter safari search. next iphone comes out–enter facebook post. third iphone makes an entrance — the iphone effect has arrived.
it’s the feeling you get when you buy an iphone and you suddenly feel as though you are the coolest person on the planet because you have a phone with an “i” in front of it. it’s nothing to be ashamed of. it happens to every idouche especially if it’s their first idevice. typically the idouche grows up and out of the phase. sometimes not…
normal person: i’m gonna get the kobe burger with fries and slaw and a root beer. what’re you gonna get?
idouche: dude, i love my phone. i got a sh-tload of new “apps.” you know they call it an app because it’s made by “apple.” i got this one…
np (interrupting): you dumbf-ck, it’s an app because it’s an “application.” anyway, who gives a sh-t? it’s a phone. the waiter is waiting for your order.
id: dude, you don’t understand. it’s an iphone. it’s so much more than a phone. it can…
np (interrupting again because the idouche won’t shut the f-ck up about his piece of sh-t phone): shut the f-ck up. you’re just suffering from the iphone effect. now order so we can eat.
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