Jemima’s Witnesses
a small, newly formed religion religion that believes this, a newly formed religion, is based on the ideology that aunt jemima is an omnipotent being that watches over the stack of pancakes that is the world as we know it. the stack of pancakes represents a multi-layered universe in which the top layer is seen as “heaven”; the middle, earth; and the lower, “h-ll”. the b-tter on top of the stack is believed to be the very dwelling of jemima herself! this layer idea is supported loosely by string theory (where multiple universe are layered side by side). it is believed that mrs. b-tterworth resides and rules the lowest pancake, where she attempts to thwart aunt jemima and all of her syrupy goodness. mrs.b-tterworth is indeed the essence of evil! last, but certainly not least, we believe that you should “eat a better breakfast “!
i’m jemima’s witnesses. i believe that mrs b-tterworth is evil.
fat black ladies with gray hair, who visit houses looking to dole out pancakes coated with syrupy goodness.
as seen on family guy.
i was hungover today, the last thing i needed was some d-mn jemima’s witness coming to my front door!!
people that knock on your door wearing bandannas and requesting that you make them pancakes.
oh sh-t, are those jemimas witnesses at the door again? tell them we don’t want to join the church of the holy flapjack.
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