Kearney


according to hoosier folktales, a kearney is,

“the coolest girl ever who doesn’t have to show off because everyone knows she’s awesome.”

this myth has since been disproved. a kearney is an instrument used to snort wasabi.
guy 1: dude, bring the kearney tonight?

guy 2: the cool girl?

guy 1: no, man, you believe in those stories?? the wasabi snorter.
to snort wasabi for two dollars.
i got drunk in a sushi bar last night and kearneyed until i cried, but at least i didn’t have to pay for dinner.
a person who is usually bald and has a pencil d-ck. usually like the army, and tends to have big bear knives lying around every room of the house.
oh i went to see kearney yesterday, he was playing darts with his bear knives, he got a bulls eye.

i heard this guy opened a condom with a bear knife, must’ve been kearney.

did you see kearney at the bar last night?
yea, i think he got a haircut.
no he’s just always bald.
kearney adjv: nuff
nufssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

= ]

have you had your (kearney) nuff yet??

rite oh! nuff said!
when someone tries to tell a story or explain something without any actual knowledge on the topic to seem intelligent; also, when someone is asked a question and does not know the answer and instead only restates the question with intention to confuse you into thinking that they are impressive.
he don’t even know what he sayin’! that dumb kearney!!!
(pr-nounced “carnie”)

verb: to throw out some made up term in a sentence and then adamantly refuse to accept the fact that the word in question is not, in fact, properly used.

noun: people who like to use random words out of context in which the meaning of the word must be guessed at based solely on the contextual use rather than any accepted definition of the word in question. (for further clarification see the second definition of the term “house” on this site).
i got kearneyed yesterday. meg and i went out for pho and she was talking about “housing” soup. she then made a lame bet and lost a dollar. the next day she went onto some web dictionary and showed me that some 5 people on the planet also share this delusion as to the use of the word. this number is quite a bit smaller though then the number of people who believe that their own c-cker spaniel is in fact god so take that for what its worth…
a kearney is a type of c-nt mostly found in ireland. their presence is most prevelant in areas of co. louth in particular.
kearney’s can normally be recognised by a balding crown, usually dotted with small amounts of ungroomed red hair.
they often have poor eyesight and can find sunlight very difficult. due to this drawback, kearney’s are most active at night, spending their time foraging for discarded tampons, a kearney’s favourite food.
my god would you look at the f-cking size of that kearney!

Read Also:

  • kebabadaddy

    used as an expression of surprise something explodes behind you and you shout “kebabadaddy!”

  • Keekers

    a person’s eyes. ‘hey, johnny, there goes lucy wright!’ ‘oh d-mn, she’s the one with the nice keekers’. black eye wullie’s got a real keeker there. to laugh; to make a joyful noise. omg…keeker keeker keeker. that was pretty funny.

  • Tules

    a m-ss culture phenom from central minnesota. that tules fellow is the coolest kid ever. the way a really, really southern person says the word or number to, too, or two. we can go ride our four wheelers, if you won’t tule one who acts like a c-ck. mr. hampton, our world history subst-tute teacher, […]

  • christicational

    christian and educational…..duh jus kuz ur tha pasor dnt mean u can just leeve ur fone aniwhere nd not xpect sum1 not 2 take it!!- a christicational psa brought to u by–yourst uly

  • pantybucket

    leaving someone (or something) alone in a vulnerable position. how could you abandon me at that party full of h-rny old men? i never pantybucket you like that!


Disclaimer: Kearney definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.