Kill the spider
the first time your wife lets you hit it after she’s been withholding s-x for so long you could swear there’s cobwebs in her birth c-n-l. just like killing a real spider, desperation rules, and the only option is to get the job done as quickly as possible.
john: liz asked me to kill the spider last night…
jim: wow, what did you do to p-ss her off in the first place?
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