kleptofecalmania
kleptofecalmania is a condition of compulsively stealing/collecting fecal matter. the kleptofecalmaniac will often wait in restroom stalls for someone to drop a deuce and promptly enter the stall and, by whatever means necessary, steal the stool(s). the compulsion of the kleptofecalmaniac is not always limited to human excrement and has been known to include dog, cat, bear, rabbit, bat, opossum, armadillo, and jackalope droppings. the motive of the t-rd burglar can vary. without regard to motive, it can be said that people exhibiting signs of kleptofecalmania should be locked in a crazy-house.
someone f-cking call the cops! there’s a kleptofecalmaniac in that restroom!
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