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the winner of american idol 2009!!!! and also the guy who made an awesome remix of “heartless”.

also, some dude’s name.
whoa– u sing like that guy who won american idol… uh oh yah kris allen.
married, plaid-wearing winner of american idol 2009 who eats kangaroos and talks about sweating and peeing too much.

his win was a shock to most but his hometown arkansas is known for backing their people major whatever it takes.

he has that face and boyband catch in his voice that shrill little girls love.

became close friends with fellow idols adam lambert and allison iraheta.
dude 1: “kris allen? uh who…?”
dude 2: “the gay guy from idol.”
dude 1: “oh. don’t watch idol. he any good?”
dude 2: “if you like average coffee house singers who cover the script, yeah.”

girl 1: “kris allen? who…?”
girl 2: “omg he’s sooo cute!!!11111”
the winner of american idol season 8 who sang no boundries by angelo batio.

an time of which the person that won hates the fact that they won.
fan1: oh did u see the season 8 winner ?
fan2: yea kris allen totaly rocked that song.

boy: whoah did you see maria’s employee of the month ceromony ?
girl: no what happened ? did she win ?
boy: yea but she totaly kris allened the whole thing, she kept saying she didn’t know how she was even close.
the winner of american idol who melts the hearts of millions and apparently,because of his looks and voice.
fan of kris allen:woah,kris allen is a hottie!
wife:duh,thats because he’s straight!
a contestant on “cr-pfest 2009” also known as american idol season 8. no one thought he would get into the top 12, but he did because of h-rny women and then a few weeks later boomed into a serious contender and could possibly win this whole sh-tfest.

kris allen is one of the better singers this year on american idol, along with adam lambert and allison iraheta. allison article coming soon.

did i mention girls wanna f-ck him?

girl 1: i wanna f-ck kris sooooo bad!111
girl 2: no me!!!!!!!!!!!! he wants mee!!!11!
obsessed kris allen fan: no b-tches i wanna f-ck him he wants mee so f off kay

(no offense to his fans.)