lax bro

a lacrosse player that devotes his life to the power of lax
that lax bro never puts down his stick!
a lax bro is a guy who plays lacrosse and fully embraces the culture. commonly found in maryland, many also spend their time outside laxin’ going to catholic schools and boating. many lax bros populate annapolis and the eastern sh-r- of maryland, mostly the easton area. they spend a lot of time in ocean city catchin’ waves or beach laxin’. lax bros will often get together for a lax sesh, which usually includes the following: some brews, some bowls, babes, dispatch, o.a.r., hemp anklets, board shorts, lax jerseys, polos, madras clothing, rainbow flip flops, and sometimes lilly pulitzer. many lax bros have long hair and join fraternities in college.

the babes surrounding lax bros are commonly their girlfriends or friends from school. an important thing to remember about lax bros is that they may sleep with a trashy girl, but kick her out immediately afterwards. lax bros will typically marry the female counterpart to himself, which is a girl who dresses with cl-ss and will take their little lax bros to lax practice starting at age 4. these girls also know how to play lax and will lax sesh with the bros from time to time. many also play field hockey. lax bros have potential to be -ssholes to girls and other people outside of their circle, but they are complete gentlemen to their ladies.

essentially, lax bros are a result of the connotations of beach culture linked with lacrosse culture, the two go hand in hand in places like maryland.
captain lax bro before a game: “do work son!”

lax bro 1: “dude, did you just see that chick?!”
lax bro 2: “yeah bro she was alright.”
lax bro 1: “just alright? son you need your eyes checked.”
lax bro 2: “bro chill, get with the flow, did you forget i’m practically engaged?”
any male individual who plays (or -ssosiciates those who play) lacrosse. they wear hats (fitted, trucker, college lax hats), bright colors, and have long hair. their vocabulary consists of, but is not limited to: word, bro, gnarly, stoked, flow, etc.
sam:yo look at those shorts, their soo bro!
kevin: yeah, they’re almost too bro!
sam: you can’t be too bro, bro!

steve: holy sh-t! look at those lax bros ^^^
the lax bro uniform, or dress code guidelines are as follows:
1) headwear: trucker hats, backwards college hats, goofy winter hats, (ie puff b-lls and ear flaps)
2) hair: the longer the better, the wavier the better (wavy lettuce out the backside of helmet or cap)
3) shirts: polos, youth league t’s, pinnies, or skins
4) shorts: plaid/madras, seersucker, long team shorts
5) footwear: rainbow, reefs, turf shoes with high black socks
6) accessories: hemp bracelets/necklace, shooting string or sidewall lace bracelets, ray-ban, arnetts, or oakley shades, lax themed tattoos (ie crossed sticks on calf)
my brother eric, also known as “meat” is a sweet lax bro. he’s been drinking lots of keystone light in his sweet ursinus hat, blonde hair, sweet lax pinney, madras, and rainbows.
a human being who has allowed their inner flame of humanity to be completely extinguished by the awesome power of the lax
bro, check out paul rabil’s flo, you can tell he’s a laxbro fosho.
someone who has flow, wears mids, and lax pinnys daily. and gets the ladies.
first guy: brah check out that kid chillen with the ladies in that lax pinny
second guy: duuuude, whatta laxbro.
anyone who lets lax take over there lives and embraces the lax gods. he will do anything to play with his stick and believe in the lax year of 2025. his ambitions are to go to john hopkins and be deemed a lax g-d. his flo is also so hard he makes woman p-ss out as he p-sses by them. the all-star of all lax names is sea b-lls it posses the btb shot. insane i know. (btb means behind the back underhanded). laxbro’s wear pinnys with their numbers at all times! they care around there sticks and their moms usually yell at them for it, but a true laxbro will only try to hide it from her and not put his stick down. a true laxbro will have a b-n-r to beat friendswood and stroke the b-tter with his lax stick. every laxbro has a pseudonym like el diablo, sea b-ss or something cool n lax like that. also every laxbro has a lax it up shirt. if your not constantly holding your stick and getting woman to think your super hot just because your a laxbro then your probably not a laxbro. also every laxbro has a back up stick that is huge and they usually carry it in their pants. also you must like to get super high all laxbro’s light the dank if their not doing that their laxin’ it up or taking care of their great flo’s. may the lax g-ds be with all laxbro’s out there.
seab-ss: dude my mom hates when i play lax in the car.
not a laxbro: dude is that possible?
seab-ss: anythings possible if your a lax bro!
-thud from a hot -ss chick walking by and p-ssing out by seeing seab-ss’ flo-
not a laxbro: dude i wanna be a lax bro
seab-ss: then come with me to practice with my coach because i practice with him everyday because we are laxbro’s
-now at practice-
peter: lax bro’s i have a b-n-r to beat friendswood
seab-ss: coach me too!!
johnny boy: its that lefty laxbro!
alex: where da dank at laxbro!
adam: mucinex f’s me up
mitch: dub step b-tches!
t. spain: i’ve been shooting all d-mn day! 100% on faceoff b-tches
jaz: john adam n zack
chronic sam: they call me the realitor cuz i get sooo many yard sales
blake: seab-ss your such a laxbro!
cameron: i like to score and i can do it with both the ladies and in lax cuz im a laxbro
johnny boy: your a r-t-rd!
peter: don’t ever skip practice to stroke the b-tter also key to the game is dodge shoot score.
not a laxbro: im gonna work so hard to be a laxbro
-a few years later-
not a laxbro, but now a laxbro: ever since ive became a laxbro ive gotten so many woman and all my friends are laxbro’s and were all soo cool and the ladies think were super hot!
-laxbro’s in a huddle-
seab-ss: break out on laxbro’s on 3…2…1
laxbro’s united: laxbros
-everywomen in the universe just came-
lax bros are the chillest of the chill. everything slides with a lax bro unless its on the field. lax bros schedules usually include some brews, some chicks, and one or two lax sesh’s a day. being a lax bro means that you fully embrace yourself in the culture. its a life decision to be a lax bro. lax bro brew of choice natty….. lax bro shirt of choice lax pinnie….
one who laxs hardcore everyday (lax bro)

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