life-lard


a lifeguard that simply sits around on their lard–ss while at work and does not pay any real attention to the swimmers. employed officially as lifeguards, such folks seem to be completely oblivious and disconnected from their job – which is to guard and protect lives. life-lards appear to care very little or nothing at all for the lives that they are supposedly guarding.
life-lards tend to avoid looking at the pool as much as possible. instead, they hide out in the office, stare into sp-ce, and/or talk incessantly to each other. life-lards also tend to send or read text messages, as a means of avoiding looking at the pool.

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