a docc-mentary by david attenborough on monty python
-scene from eighth episode of life of brian-
david attenborough: …and no better place to view a monty pythons sense of comedy is just over this wall -david attenborough looks down at brian-
-a centurion catches brian writing graffiti on the palace wall.-
centurion: what’s this, then? “romanes eunt domus”? people called romanes, they go the house?
brian: it says, “romans go home.”
centurion: no, it doesn’t! what’s the latin for “roman”? come on, come on !
brian: er, “rom-n-s”!
centurion: goes like?
centurion: vocative plural of “annus” is?
brian: er, “anni”!
centurion: “romani”… -writes “romani” over brian’s graffiti- “eunt”? what is “eunt”?
centurion: conjugate the verb, “to go”!
brian: er, “ire.” er, “eo,” “is,” “it,” “imus,” “itis,” “eunt.”
centurion: so, “eunt” is… ?
brian third person plural present indicative, “they go”.
centurion: but, “romans go home” is an order. so you must use… ? -twists brian’s ear-
brian: aaagh! imperative!
centurion: which is…?
brian: aaaaagh! er, er… “i”, “i”!
centurion: how many romans?
brian: aaaaagh! plural, plural… er, “ite”!
centurion: “ite”… -writes “ite” on wall- “domus”? nominative? “go home” is motion toward, isn’t it?
brian: dative! -centurion pulls out gladius and holds it against brian’s throat- aaagh! not the dative, not the dative! er, er… accusative, accusative, “ad domum”, sir, “ad domum”!
centurion: except “domus” takes the…?
brian: the locative, sir!
centurion: which is…?
centurion: “domum”… -writes “domum” on wall- um. understand? now, write it out a hundred times.
brian: yes, sir. thank you, sir. hail caesar, sir.
centurion: hail caesar! and if it’s not done by sunrise, i’ll cut your b-lls off.
david attenborough: -turns toward the camera- amazing
- ghetto stain
a girl who sleeps with several groups of men (hoodrats) last night i seen that girl go home with steven, and tonight she is going home with his best friend ben, & i bet tomorrow she’ll be going home with travis; shes such a ghetto stain.
to be stuck in the h-ll hole of jury duty. i have been injuryed all week.
any time you go to mcdonald’s and order something “for here.” having a sit down meal at mcdonald’s. i went to mcfancy’s the other day, thank god for bottomless beverages.
encypted p-ssword hackers mostly try to crack… dude this f-ck-ng decrypter sucks d-ck, it can’t crack the md5, wdf! an encryption algorithm commonly used to verify the integrity of data, or to store p-sswords in such a way that they’re computationally infeasible to find. – “the md5 sum of my p-ssword is 9c63aaa3d0f2d4648b1b348734d625a9.” – “doooood…why’d […]
- mr zellers
the most bad-ss teacher in the whole united states. he also smokes joints nonstop person 1: dude i heard mr zellers is bad-ss friend: h-ll yeah man he is h-lla dope