literal ‘net

a phenomenon on the internet that involves the inability and tendency for most people on the “net” to not comprehend when a joke or flippancy is being used in conversation and to credulously take what is said at face value. hyperbole, bombastic statements, sarcasm and other tools of casual language are completely lost on them. usually those who have little to no experience with online forums and chat rooms fall into this trap as they are often this dumb in real life. sometimes children fall victim to this mental lapse, however there is still a chance they can grow a sense of humor before drinking age.

this behavior is often used as a compulsive and lame humor device in conversation which is an “epic phail” because it makes the humorist look like a credulous cretin instead of a sharp satirist. in actuality the idiot can’t help but respond to everything they’re reading or hearing and just has to make a comment, no matter how stupid. often because the idiot doesn’t know how to socialize normally.

see: gullible.
molly: “omg! i laughed so hard watching the office last night i peed my pants!”
idiot: “really? why would you admit that you peed your pants online? you probably have some kind of bladder condition that you need help for.”
molly: “really?? seriously?? i didn’t actually pee my pants, dude. yeesh!”
idiot: “then why did you say you did?”
molly: “wow! just wow! this is sooo literal ‘net!”