Marty Massage
a circuit training program which combines exercise with m-ssage. this was created by major martha halftrack, us army (ret.). usually done in the mornings before her husband, amos, gets up. it is very comforting. so, if you want comfort without a barrage, go to camp swampy and get a marty m-ssage.
marty: hey bryant, you look tired, honey. what can i do to wake you up? (suddenly snaps her hand) i know, how about a marty m-ssage? you love those!
bryant: okay, how about five minutes of m-ssage, then we run down to the dfac and back again, and then another m-ssage? (jumps up and takes off running)
marty: whoah! hold up! we haven’t even done the warm up stretches, yet. remember, you can’t do pt cold body. you’d rip a muscle, sweetie pie.
amos: what are you two doing? oh, the marty m-ssage? i love that! can i do it, too?
bryant: sure! drop and give me one-fifty! (blows the whistle) ten hut!
marty: good g-d! one hundred and fifty push ups? that’s a lot of push ups. that’s my honeybear, don’t burn him up!
bryant: i’m not. (they all start running for the dfac) i’m hungry. all this exercise made me want to eat.
amos: whoah! me too! i gotta eat. then, after we eat, we can burn off more goo. good thing she knows what she’s talking about.
marty: well, would any of you like a m-ssage? its not just exercise, its m-ssage too! the marty m-ssage is awesome!
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