matchturbate
to m-st-rb-t- to the profile picture of a person on match.com.
yeah, i went on a date with that chick once. it didn’t work out, but i still matchturbate to her profile pic after i come home drunk sometimes. but then i end up reading her profile and get sad when i read the part about her dog dying, and i can’t finish.
subscribing to match.com for the sole purpose of masturbating to photos opposed to searching for a match.
dude : i’m going home to matchturbate.
matt : have you found ‘the one’ on match yet?
mike: no, man…i just use that site to matchturbate.
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