Matt Foley


character played by chris farley frequently appearing on sat-rday night live until farley’s death in 1997. matt foley, motivational speaker, yelled, demeaned, and gave a clearly negative message in each of his 8 rants on snl. foley’s trademark was screaming in the middle of his speech, warning that the current situation would result in being “…thrice divorced and living in a van down by the river!”

also:
one of the greatest high school distance runners of the 21st century whose shocking good looks and amazing legs have been impressing women since 1989. often referred to as “the man”. synonymous with perfection.
matt foley is the best snl skit ever created.

matt foley is a god.

we have reached a level near that of matt foley i thought previously unattainable.

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