McMopper


a mcmopper is the very awkward mentally r-t-rded person who sweeps up the floors and mops up after obese people leave messes all over mcdonalds.

although a mcmopper is usually a nice person who wouldn’t hurt a fly with his filthy little hands, he is very socially awkward, and he insists on making eye contact with everyone, and saying h-llo strangely loud.

the problems that mcmoppers cause far overshadow any small good they achieve in a 3 1/2 hour tard shift at a mcdonalds near you. for some people who are highly tolerant mcmoppers are not much of a problem, but to the rest of us they are an unnecessary distraction while we stuff our dirty face holes with half rotten beef liver scr-ps that have been pressed into burger shaped patties and stuffed into a bun with special sauce.
me: “f-cking dammit sh-t-covered d-ck-ss i just made eye-contact with that mcmopper.”

w-lly (mcmopper): “h-lllllowwww ! ! ! ! !”

me: “hey buddy, i’ll give you a brand new $5 bill to see how many mcnuggets you can fit in your mouth in the middle of the road, and if the cars touch you, you get a sticker!”

w-lly: “okayyyy”

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