Middlebury

a small amish community in the north central part of indiana. it is famous for the das ditchman essenhause amish style resturant. this city is pr-ne to the migration of elderly from all over the country during the warmer months of the year. the amish themselves are quite a tourist attraction with their keen skills in farming, woodworking, and quilt making in which all of these services are overpriced. it is the home to northridge highschool where the only thing it is known for is having the largest freshman cl-ss than the year before it and the cross country team. when traveling through this one street city it only takes a matter of seconds to be in and out so it is basically the wh-r- of northern indiana.

also this city is notorious for its rebel redneck fan base, though the state was a part of the union many of the residents of middlebury fly the confederate flag screaming git “r” done out the windows of their piickups while going to the county fair to check out the pigs and other farm animals that the convenently also have at home.
“so where are you from”
“middlebury, indiana”
“where the f-ck is that?”
do you know where south bend is”
“yeah”
“just go east about 45 minutes on u.s. 20 until you get slowed down by a buggy”

“hey grandma why cant we sit on the couch?”
“because i spent $5000 on that quilt you little snot nosed punks!”

“so how did the football team do?”
“i dont know, i never go to the games”
“wheres your school spirit”
“i lost it at the pep session at school”
a really small town in vermont where there’s only 7,000 people and it’s the biggest town in the county. where all the hippies trip on shrooms and all the rich college kids blow aderol. once in a while a redneck get killed in a dui, keeping the population in check.
i wanna buy some drugs, so let’s go to middlebury.