Mike Pence
that long painful moment when you’re taking a huge sh-t, but no feces comes out. it’s almost like diarrhea, except your stomach is literally tearing apart within the insides. this phenomenon lasts about 2-4 hours, depending on the severity of the condition. common side effects include nausea, h-m-phobia, misogyny, fascism, and conservatism.
-exists bathroom-
me: dude…i just totally suffered in there.
friend: what happened bro?
me: i had a long mike pence
friend: aw dude, i know how you feel. mike pences are so painful and horrible.
#p–p republican donald trump sh-t feces death
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