molly malone

the character from the namesake irish folk song – now an unofficial anthem of dublin city.
it tells the tale of a beautiful fishmonger who plied her trade on the streets of dublin, but who died young. is it popularly believed that molly malone was a part-time prost-tute and died of an std/stv/sti – like gonorrhea – for which there was no medication at the time.

“molly malone” is sung by supporters of dublin gaa, leinster rugby teams, gillingham fc and the irish international rugby team. it was also featured in the film, a clockwork orange.

to refer to a girl (especially an irish girl, and especially especially if they are from monaghan – which is a sh-t place to live or be from, with a horrible warbling accent and low hygiene standards) who is undignified, ungraceful, lacking in self-respect and, while may not actually be a paid-for-wh-r-(cos they suck in the sack – and not in a good way), is a total sl-t! it is a derogatory term. n-body would want this name to be used as a referral to them! you’d want to be some major f-cked-up f-ck head otherwise!!!
in dublin’s fair city,
where the girls are so pretty,
i first set my eyes on sweet molly malone,
as she wheeled her wheel-barrow,
through streets broad and narrow,
crying, “c-ckles and mussels, alive, alive, oh!”

“alive, alive, oh,
alive, alive, oh”,
crying “c-ckles and mussels, alive, alive, oh”.

she was a fishmonger,
and sure ’twas no wonder,
for so were her father and mother before,
and they each wheeled their barrow,
through streets broad and narrow,
crying, “c-ckles and mussels, alive, alive, oh!”

(chorus)
she died of a fever,
and no one could save her,
and that was the end of sweet molly malone.
now her ghost wheels her barrow,
through streets broad and narrow,
crying, “c-ckles and mussels, alive, alive, oh!”
(chorus)

now i don’t mean to be blunt,
but that b-tch is a c-nt,
she really needs to change, and i don’t just mean her smelly underwear…
get a focking clue, that’s right i mean you! you wanna f-ck with me? well, you’d better beware!
cos you do not have the cognitive capacity to take on my slickness & bombasity (you don’t know what that word means do you :p); cos i’m what you’d be so don’t f-ck with me you stupid b-tch with your flopsy hair!!!!
(chorus)

dude: haha b-tch, f-ck you, i’m the mother-f-cking president and you’re just a dirty wh-r-!
hot chick: that’s not a nice thing to say.
dude: i’m just telling it like it is – that b-tch is ‘molly’ malone after all…
hot chick: oh, well in that case i guess it’s okay. em, wanna go back to my place and, like, watch a movie or something? 😉
dude: or something.
hot chick: what?
dude: nothing, yeah let’s hangout at yours gorgeous :)!!!!! (score!!! life is good!!)

alpha male: hey, did you hear? that ‘molly’ malone chick got creamed in the election.
omega man: really? how much did she lose by?
alpha male: focking tonnes apparently. she didn’t even get into double digits :d she got royally mollied!
omega man: i thought that term could only be used in reference to table-tennis..
alpha male: nah, it’s cool; it’s totally transferable.
pythagoras mc angleson: that silly gormless b-tch. what did she think she was doing going up against the king of win like that? she was always going to lose! that dude exudes charisma like the chief himself!
omega man: true that. all hail the chief! his reputation shall live on for all times like that of the great and handsome j.f.k. and che guevara!!!!