music snob

a person who believes s/he has a more refined taste in music and has much more knowledge in the field of music in general. every song and genre is unacceptable unless the sn-b happens to like it, then it is absolute perfection. music sn-bs feel obligated to enlighten everyone with unwelcome critiques and irrelivant musical trivia.
person 1: that -sshole turns her nose up at anything that isn’t part of her narrow, carefully hand picked library of music.
person 2: music sn-b?
person 1: definitely.
an especially irritating breed of tool, the music sn-b is a self described authority on what is or is not “good” music. the genre is irrelavant, as music sn-bs somehow confuse their subjective opinions with objective concrete facts across all genres of music. the music sn-b is quick to write off your taste in music, and often spout proudly a large number of “better” unknown and/or less “commercial” bands that if you had as good of taste as they did, you would already know about and love. the music sn-b can be found at low budget local record stores, probably arguing with a clerk about how no good bands cds are for sale. the music sn-b often prides themselves on their, again, self described “non-conformist” interests, and everyone else is merely a braindead product of mtv. the music sn-b fails to realize the definition of the word opinion: 1. a belief or judgment that rests on grounds insufficient to produce complete certainty.
2. a personal view, att-tude, or appraisal., and instead dilludes themselves into thinking that their opinions are more valid than those of anyone whos differ.
music sn-b: oh my god, is that (insert band here), they suck, they are totally (insert bizzare music sub-genre) not real (insert music genre). if you werent such a sheep youd listen to (insert 1, to an indefinate number of obscure/unpopular bands).

person#2: wow you are one annoying f-ggot -ss music sn-b, why dont you go choke on a d-ck and die while listening to (insert a likely cr-ppy band they mentioned) you -ss sucking b-tch f-ck.
a specimen that is pr-ne to be of high levels of irritance to the normal person. in general, they hold the belief that their musical taste and their musical taste alone is relevant while anyone who has opposing or different opinions on music is considered stupid and won’t hesitate to spew snotty remarks at you. these people are often pretentious poseurs who always make an -ss out of themselves as they claim to be “non-conformist” for listening to indie bands with quirky names who have song t-tles that are at least ten words in length. the funny thing is, is that they don’t realize that they are actually the biggest conformers out there for listening to, or claiming to listen to certain bands or genres in order to fit into a certain scene or gain some cred.

generalizations aside, they are the adolf hitlers of music and if you don’t like the exact same music they do, they will cut you down in ridiculous ways for having a different opinion and it often leads to broken friendships. if you find that you are friends with a music sn-b, do yourselves a favor and just cut them loose right away. it’ll save your fist from being hit by their face when they find out you listen to mainstream. there are some who will even criticize others for not being as pedantic about music or a band as they are or even simple things as to why you are interested in the artists you like.
general music sn-b: excuse me? you listen to britney spears? that’s not real music; that’s manufactured cr-p! try listening to real music like suzie crotchrocket and the breast rashes!

pretentious poseur: all the bands i listen to are known by fewer than 100 people and you can’t find their alb-ms in stores, so that totally means i have a better taste in music than everyone! i’m so hxc!

know-it-all: unless you read the liner notes of every alb-m, read all of their biographies, know all the words to their released and unreleased songs by heart and look up every possible bit of information on the band as soon as you hear about them on the internet like i do, you don’t deserve to call yourself a fan of music! hmph!
one who only listens to obscure bands, shuns anything more popular than that, and tries to drill it into you.
music sn-b: “what are you listening to?”
person: “ac/dc.”
music sn-b: “why do you even bother with that cr-p, try some -insert here pretentious-pseudo-intellectual-band-name-.”
an -sshole that slags every other genre than the genre or genres he/she listens to. completely the most immature, ignorant sob’s this world has to offer.
everyone who has ever said that a professional band sucks.
this goes double for you emo- and pop-bashers. that’s just stupid.
a person that automatically despises and rejects all people of different (and inferior) musical taste.
person a: i don’t think your friend nick likes me
person b: why?
person a: because i listen to pop music
person b: he’s such a music sn-b
someone who thinks they are the biggest fan of a band and if someone doesn’t know everything about the band they are not true fans.
susie: i love this song and i really like this band.
billy: yeah? bet you didn’t know that the b-ssest has 15 letters in his full name and hates pickles. you don’t understand them like i do.
susie: d-mn music sn-b.

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