North Attleboro
town in se m-ssachusetts, home to north attleboro high and the aptly named “red rocketeers”. the whole town revels vicariously in the exploits of these young jocko h-m-s, who famously engage in a frenzied team circle jerk before every game. when their high school glory days end, many join the fascist town police force. for the rest, it’s off to the box factory, to regale coworkers with dull tales beginning with “remember that time we beat (fill in name of nearby dull sh-tburg)…good times, good times” m-ssive weight gain ensues quickly after graduation, followed by heart attack and/or stroke by age 40.
girlfriend: i don’t understand…it’s still soft…don’t you like me johnny?
johnny: sorry susie…big game this friday, you know…i have to save my best for the team (gets wistful, faraway look)
johnny’s fat dad: (bursting into family room) d-mn straight son…north attleboro rules! now you just get yourself back to wh-r- island, missy!
johnny and dad engage in a tight manly hug
a town in southeast m-ssachusetts home of the red rocketeers that kicks all other towns -ss in football, baseball, track, and wrestling, they especially like to dominate attleboro, mansfield, foxboro, sharon, franklin, you name it north attleboro owns it. also they throw the best 311 partys and attend all the concerts way more than sh-tty attleboro
dude 1: hey dude 311 day is next weekend
dude 2: yea man 311 is the mad notes. we’ll party up here in north attleboro first and then go to the concert
dude 1: should we stop by in attleboro to check out their parties?
dude 2: am i a f-ckin r-t-rd? h-ll no attleboro sucks donkey b-lls
a town in southeast m-ssachusetts home of the red rocketeers that kicks all other towns -ss in football, baseball, track, and wrestling, they especially like to dominate attleboro, mansfield, foxboro, sharon, franklin, you name it north attleboro owns it. also they throw the best 311 partys and attend all the concerts way more than sh-tty attleboro
dude 1: hey dude 311 day is this weekend and they are playing at the tweet
dude 2: sh-t man 311 is the mad notes, ok we’ll party here in north attleboro first then we’ll go to the concert
dude 1: should we hit up attleboro and check out there parties?
dude 2: is my name billy bob f-ckin thorton? f-ck no attleboro sucks more d-ck than jenna jameson on a good day
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