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1. the cr-ppiest place in northwest washington for people under the age of 50 to chill.
2. the largest dutch pothead community.
3. an island of suck.
guy:dude!! wanna go to oak harbor??? its an island!!
other guy: no.
oak harbor is not the most boring place on earth. the little town of coupeville, wich is oak towns neighbor. im sure that anyone who has spent more than 15 minutes in coupeville would be able to relate with me.
oak harbor is the secound most boring place on earth. so boring infact, that people have to find things to do, like drive around in fast rice burners, and spray paint on the public highschool. to fully enjoy oak harbor, try these things.
1. stand outside the nearest mexican restruant, and scream, “viva mexico!”
2. buy a cheap honda, put on a flowmaster, super charge it, and race down boon road, against the farmers in their tractors.
3. go out to city beach at midnight, and bang on light poles untill you get arrested.
4. sign up for a certain english teacher in the highschool, and prepare for a year of trouble.
5. jump in the lagoon.
6. have coffee at angelo’s.
7. go to walmart, buy goldfish, then put them on the dq grill.
tyler: dude, lets go hang out in oak harbor.
seth: my mom said no, because ill probably either get run over by one of the vandersnoots, or arrested, because the cops have nothing better to do than arrest little boys.
tyler: lets go to coupeville then.
seth: no.
a small city on whidbey island. it rains 360 days a year. the rest of the time it is windy and dark. local entertainment is mainly the local movie theater, which doesn’t get mainstream movies until they come out on betamax or vhs. we’re still waiting for t-tanic to be released here. also inhabited by thousands-upon thosands of asians. the official language of oak harbor is either tagalog or tagalog.
john: another beautiful day in oak harbor!
matt: rain?
john: yep.

john: let’s find out what’s at the movies…
matt: wow, finally purple rain has came here!
the gay; a place where old dutch people suck the fun out of things. little racial diversity i.e. 7 blacks, 30,000 asains, 9,000 whites, 1 mexican, 1 native american; a place that is gay; not a fun place to be.
guy: i live in oak harbor

other guy: gay?
a small city on whidbey island in washington. mostly inhabitted by asians, despite its dutch roots. there is also a navy base there. it isn’t very diverse and has a horrible reputation, mostly for how boring it is, but in reality if you’ve spent enough time there you find legitamately enjoyable features about it, and it gains a certain charm.
new resident: oak harbor is small, too asian, and boring as f-ck.
old resident: oak harbor isn’t that bad and i enjoy living here.
1. where retirement homes and a naval base meet, resulting in a place of suck for anybody unlucky enough to be within a 15 mile radius.

2. a place known for its dutch roots but is now being taken over by 50% of the filipinos in the world.

3. a place where the only thing to p-ss time is get high or have s-x, which explains all the 15 year-old mothers and mental cases walking around.
dude 1: hey man, i’m so bored! what do you wanna do?

dude 2: are you sh-tting me? we’re in oak harbor! there’s nothing to do!

dude 1: we could go bang my sister.

dude 2: meh, i’m getting bored of that. want to go to the bus station?

dude 1: wha? what’s at the bus station?

dude 2: chronic, what else would be at a bus station?

dude 1: oh, dude… totally.
oak harbor a real sh-tty town on whidbey island, washington. never ever move 2 oak harbor. it rains 365 days a year never gets abouve 75 in the summer, snow @ thanksgiving not chrismas and febuary. terrible wind storms etc. ghetto -ss town. consisting of 14,000 asians 7,000 whites and around 2,000 black ppl. and they’re a whole bunch of potheads.
person 1:hey! wut r u doing this summer?

person 2:visiting my grandparents in oak harbor.

person 1:d-mn. that sux.

person 2:yea….

person 1:well i here u can get pot up there 4 cheap.

person 2:yea the only good thing about oakharbor.

don’t go 2 oak harbor

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