Oberlin



a microscopic college town just outside of cleveland, known for its racous disregard for s-xual mores, internationally renowned conservatory of music, and annual bike derby. other highlights include drag ball, the big parade, and quarter beers at the ‘sco.
students are characterized by efficiency in everything they do, from studying to partying to developing anxiety disorders. they resort to online services such as facebook to make up for their ackward social skills. after graduation they become lovable teddy bears with vicious political goals.
if it wasn’t for oberlin, i might have a normal girlfriend, but since i’m here i might as well enjoy the ride.

arggghh. we be the blasted pirate bears of oberlin, hand over all your blueberries and n-body gets a nugy.
both a town and a college in northeast ohio in lorain county founded by two presbyterian ministers, john jay shipherd, and his student, philo p. stewart. it is named for john frederick oberlin, an alsatian minister.
the college is particularly celebrated for its conservatory and its activist student body.
significant events in the town’s history include the wellington rescue.
tappan square is a park in oberlin.
a family name, confirming commitment to certain social activities. activities known to be acted out by oberlins include, but are not limited to: drinking, hot-tubbing, danceparty-ing, drinking, laughing, drinking, farting, laughing about farting, eating too much cause its so good, tobogganning, drinking, singing way to loud when said drinking has been commited, dancing innapropriately, and drinking.
oberlin memeber: “did you ever go to an oberlin party”
someone: “i think so but i can’t remember”
oberlin member: ” right on!”
a small town of about 2000 people in southwestern louisiana. one red light, a couple of gas stations, and the dollar store. local teens amuse themselves by “looping” main street (3 whole blocks) and having casual s-x with their peers. girls are, in fact, known for their “hoeing” proclivities (see hoberlin). residents of oberlin celebrate a very traditional mardi gras celebration, beginning with a chicken run in the early morning hours, continuing with a long procession of vehicles and horses throughout the countryside, proceeding into a parade, and finally a gumbo-and-dance event at night…all done while wearing costumes and drinking large quant-ties of alcohol.
hey, y’all…let’s go to oberlin tomorrow for mardi gras!

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