office chimp

the fat stupid guy at work that sucks up to the boss, spouts simplistic plat-tudes, and thinks he is more experienced because he has worked there 20 years but you always seem to be fixing his f-ck ups.
the office chimp at work came over to help me. i just wanted him to get away from me because he annoys me and he f-cks things up all the time.
“there’s no ‘i’ in team, that’s what i always say.” the office chimp stated.
just to be a d-ck to him and hopefully drive him away, i brought up maureen’s promotion that he was hoping to get.
“it’s okay, good things come to those who wait. i will get it next time.” the office chimp replied.
jesus f-cking christ, i thought to myself. would you just go the f-ck away.
our boss walked by, and the office chimp stopped what he was doing and f-cked up the order of my doc-ments in the process.
“how are you doing today frank?” the office chimp said overly cheerful.
frank answered, “good, glad to see you helping out over here.”
“got to teach these young guys, i have been here 20 years and they can learn a lot from me. of course the people are our most important -sset too! we wouldn’t be anywhere without them and we need to step in and show we appreciate them.” the f-cking moron office chimp said.