Ozumba

a last name commonly possessed by a rare subspecies of supreme h-m-sapien, chiefly characterized by their t-tan-like physiques and seemingly infinite cognitive capabilities. ozumbas sensory mechanisms are unequivocally heightened, often causing them to be mistaken by many for superheroes (whom, unlike ozumbas, do not exist). ozumbas also exhibit extraordinarily high degrees of comp-ssion, humility, kindness and courage. these, in combination with their outstanding ability to utilize reason and fair judgement, enable them to be effective and well-honored magistrates in their social environments.

there are many myths and legends which attribute even more superfluous characteristics to ozumbas. to date, however, contemporary archaeological and ancient historical research has yielded very little doubt among respective communities that any of these descriptions const-tute an accurate representation of them in reality. many scholars believe that ozumbas are the greatest beings to have ever walked the planet.
person a: hey, it was so incredible meeting you!! you know everything about me. and i don’t know why, but i am so attracted to you, i think i’m in love!! what did you say your name was again?

person b: hugh ozumba