Priestly Fuck


1- an act of intercourse where the male involved seems completely switched off from the idea that the woman is meant to be getting pleasure, and instead simply gallops towards the s-m-n depositing finale. it leaves the woman feeling like she may as well have been elsewhere. this is a priestly f-ck, as one imagines that’s exactly how a priest would do it- with as little extra contact as possible so as to make it less of a sin.

2- that guy who disapproves of everything you do that he can’t, much like a priest does. he’s the bloke who feels it necessary to make himself look better than you by reacting with disgust and incredulous disbelief when hearing of your exploits. he’s a priestly f-ck, that one. he probably w-nks and cries over tales of his mate’s debauchery.
1- “i thought you liked tim, why did you split up?”

“well, he was a good guy outside of the bedroom, but once we got in there, he subjected me to the most priestly f-ck ever, and didn’t show any interest in trying again. it’s over.”

2- tom- “so i sh-gged them both. you only live once, right?”

(the -ssembled mates laugh and agree, gazing at tom in awe. all except for one.)

ross- “you ought to be ashamed of yourself”

(ross gets up and goes to the bar, shaking his head and tutting. the men sit and reel in disbelief)

tom- “priestly f-ck!”

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