Prizzly Bear


a prizzly is a mix between a polar bear and grizzly bear. indigenous to canada, they make their living by mauling innocent by-standers, and eating their tasty insides, later discarding their fleshy husks.

contrary to common belief, prizzlies are not colored with a mix of white and brown, but can change colors at will, and camouflage in accordance with their surroundings. this tactic is useful when stalking it’s human prey.

a little known fact of prizzlies, is that they are in fact, cold-blooded, but unlike other cold-blooded creatures, these vile beasts absorb their warmth from the limp carc-sses of their human victims as they gorge on their internal organs. these vicious killers are predicted to attempt to take over the world in the bear uprising of 2088.
prizzly bear facts:

-as it becomes an adult, it can be as tall as 7′, weigh 500lbs (and be 6″ long).
-a prizzly bear, when provoked, will fling fecal matter at its enemy until covered.
-all prizzly bears enjoy rap music … because they’re down with that.
-an estimated 6,900 prizzly bears perished durring the holocaust.
-these gruesome creatures lurk anywhere there is honey or blood to be found.
-the eyes of the prizzly can paralyze a victim if he/she looks into them directly.
– prizzly bears are able to tolerate temperatures as cold as -1000 degrees celsius while still b-tt-naked.

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