Public Displays of Perfection

plural noun: also known as pdp, public displays of perfection can ecomp-ss a variety of acts put on by people to show others how superior they are to those around them. pdp range from “my child is an honor student at kiss-my–ss-you-know-i’m-better-than-you preschool” b-mper stickers placed on outlandishly-expensive, over-sized gas-guzzling suvs, to trophy wives with ridiculously giant breast implants, not-of-this-world-colored blond hair, thousand-dollar extensions, spray tans, and stick-figure-thin arms dripping with jewelry, the value of which equals the gross national product of some nations, strapped to the sides of men who they never would look twice at except for the fact that they own three homes, a yacht, and several race horses.

public displays of perfection can also be as simple as a woman primping herself in her rearview mirror, tossing her hair around, and purposefully holding up traffic so everyone around her can take in how absolutely gorgeous both she, her vehicle, and her yappy little lap dog are.

men are known to succ-mb to pdp even without trophy wives. this usually happens in places such as gyms or other venues where groups of men gather and find themselves shamelessly flexing and posing as though they are about to be crowned the next mr. universe.

men seem to use expensive sports cars for their public displays of perfection, not realizing that women could give a f-ck what they drive and actually find these pdp quite juvenile.
did you see that guy with the corvette and the chick with the b–b job? what a couple sad public displays of perfection!

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