pygmy shrew


the pygmy shrew is a fascinating creature, the smallest animal in g-d’s kingdom. the shrew is almost completely blind, and must rely on its barely adequare sense of smell to avoid its natural predators… the fox, the badger, the cat, the dog, the bear, the dolphin, the donkey, the bat, the crayfish, the buffalo, the saw, the polar bear, the crab, the plane, the monkey, the saw, the fork, the banshee, the harpsichord, the common-earthworm, and other shrews. the shrew is so tiny that it cannot maintain body heat without constant exposure to sunlight. in the winter, most will not survive… the shrew’s young are born utterly hairless, and will remain so for the rest of their lives. they are entirely dependent on their mother – most of whom die in labor. the mothers that do survive face a grim future, hunted and killed by their young for sport. 99% of the baby shrews will not survive their first night unless they are found by a kindly shrew farm attendant…
it’s f-cked, basically.

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