ream of the ancient mariner
this requires the use of a dead albatross and a dirty old sailor. while engaged in doggystyle intercourse, tie the dead albatross around her neck, and while she is struggling to remove the filthy animal, quickly switch places with a dirty old sailor, who will give her a good jabbin’ and the surprise of her life. can be combined with the rodeo. perfect for breakup scenarios.
i wanted to end it with jill, so i contracted a dirty old sailor, caught an albatross at the pier, and ended our relationship with a ream of the ancient mariner.
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