rear admiral

from an interview with “the simpsons” creators.

regarding “rear admiral,” i think the answer is probably as disappointing as you feared it might be: it doesn’t exist. here is the actual first draft script excerpt from the halloween show:

bart: milhouse. milhouse, wake up. quick, look out the window.
milhouse: no way, bart. if i lean over and put my face against the window, you’re gonna smash it, or maybe pinch my b-tt real hard.

this was the first draft. in re-writing it, the writers wanted to go for something a little funnier, something that would sound like it was from the family of “flying wedgie,” “purple nurple,” etc. someone, i do not remember who, said “rear admiral.” it sounds real, having the word “rear” in it, but it was manufactured to sound real. as far as we know, it doesn’t really exist.
bart: milhouse…milhouse, wake up, quick! look out the window.
milhouse: no way, bart. if i lean over, i leave myself open to wedgies, wet w-ll–s, or even the dreaded rear admiral!
while performing intercourse doggystyle, the man pulls the womans hands behind her back and attempts to thrust her around a room. a full circuit around the room will make you a rear admiral.
you should have seen her knee’s after i earned my rear admiral!
this term refers to a person who likes to stick long phallic-like objects up their r-ct-m. the term was coined in the 1970s to describe high-ranking military officials who enjoyed poking their intestinal basin with objects that are similar in shape to a man’s genitals. the motivation for this is unknown and the term is usually used in a derogatory fashion to describe someone.
person 1: “why didn’t steve want to come over for my college graduation party?” person 2: “he was put off by the footage that leaked, proving he’s a rear admiral. i don’t think he can deal with the social pressures of confrontation on the topic.” person 1: “you mean he might start trying to push people off the balcony like elliot rodger at a house party?” person 2: “precisely.”
a senior rank in the navy.
he was promoted to rear admiral
to knee someone in the nuts from behind.
jordan was bending over, cleaning his p-b-s out of the drain, so i took the opportunity to add insult to injury by giving him the rear admiral.
the act of engaging in intercourse with a woman from behind and using the momentum of your movement to propel you across a room. a performer of the rear admiral must hold his hands in the air so as to not balance or steady himself.
i exercised the rear admiral last night with linda and was able to get 15 feet before we fell down!
the t-tle of rear admiral is given to a man that has had -n-l s-x with 50 or more women
kym is a certified rear admiral

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